Batman #4

Bruce Wayne enters the kitchen wearing the below images pajamas. Yawning and grabbing his favorite Hello Kitty coffee mug in hand making himself a cup.

with his warm cup he relaxes and looks out the window sighing taking in the view. He tastes it and spits it out coughing.

Bruce: what the hell?

A soft snickering could be heard in the background as bruce checked what was inside the coffee maker. Inside was the below image.

Bruce: What kind of coffee is this?

He looks at it as if inspecting it. His face shows confusion but his lip is curled in an angry snarl to the thought that someone other than Alfred might have changed the coffee pod.

Bruce: *muttering* Alfred normally tells me when he got something new…

He walks over, opens up where the trash can is and then he goes across the kitchen

The reader sees a transparent outline of bat mite leave the pod as he throws the pod into the trashcan like a basketball. And it makes it into the can.

Bat Mite: nice shot! laughing

Bruce looks around the kitchen as he puts the trash bin away and searches the kitchen opening and closing cabinets. He opens a cabinet with pots in it and out jumps bat mite.

Batmite: Hello batman! I have to say I'm your biggest fan-

Bruce grabs bat mite by his oversized head with one hand closing the cabinet with the other and slams him on the counter pissed.

Instead of making the usual thud sound. Batmite squeaked.

Bruce: I. Dont. care. NEVER. MESS. WITH. MY. MORNING. COFFEE. 

Bat Mite: geez! Cool it batman!

Snaps his fingers and turns into confetti transporting himself onto the toaster.

Bruce: it's too early for magical bullshit.

glares at bat mite on the war path.

Batmite: You know you're the first batman I have seen to actually cuss in a very long time. Not only that you look different than the other batmen. 

Batmite floats around batman inspecting him muttering

Bat Mite: But you also look way different than any other batman i met. Is that the only thing that make you unique? Or do you have any other personality trait other than rich man with chocolate colored skin?

While bat mite was talking, Bruce reaches behind the speech bubble and opens the kitchen window.

Bruce then grabs bat mite by the shirt.

Bruce: shut. The fuck. Up. I don't give an shit about you or my multiversal counterparts. I am me. And I don't like you.

Batmite stares wide eyed at Bruce before a sinister looking smirk appears on his face.

Batmite: oooh you're gonna be fun~

Bruce: Oh sure let me show you something else fun.

he looks out the kitchen window and lets out a loud whistle catching the super pups attention

Bruce: CHEW TOY! 

He throws bat mite out the window and the super pups fly up and catch bat mite chewing and knawing on him.

Batmite: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Bat Mite: no no what are you doing no nono nooooooooooooooooo

Bruce then closes the kitchen window muffling the sound from the yard chuckling.

Bruce: Good luck bitch. No one messes with my morning coffee.

He goes over to a small cabinet and pulls out a coffee pod putting it in. making himself another morning coffee.

Batmite teleports into the kitchen all torn up from the super pups.

Bat Mite: not cool bats!

Bruce sipping his coffee looking at bat mite with a neutral face.

Bruce: Only my enemies call me that tiny bitch. Now you have until I finish my morning coffee to explain yourself and why you touched my coffee machine. 

Bat Mite: okay then. I’m bat mite head of the interdimensional batman fan club. I’m from the fifth dimension and I like to visit all my idols across the multiverse which includes you! 

He displays his chaos magic by showing different versions of Batman surrounding them both.

Bruce is still drinking his coffee.

Bat Mite: i'm not here to help you or anything, I'm just here to watch and get to know the current version of you and see your adventures.

By this point Bruce has finished his coffee, he nods, setting it down and then he grabs bat mite by the neck and looks him dead in the eye.

Bruce: Since this is our first meeting in this dimension I will only say this once. Dont. mess. With. my. Coffee. This is your only warning. understand bat bastard?

For a moment bat mite looks nervous but then he smirks.

Bat Mite: oh yes brucey~ choke me harder~

Bruce get s an disgusted look on his face and lets him go sighing.

Bruce: You're just like condiment king.

He rubs his face.

Batmmite disappears and Bruce picks up his mug, putting it in the sink and washes it before leaving the kitchen.

Issue 4 ends